To those who have seen me lumber around a field playing flag football or softball, or lag far behind nearly every play in hockey, it may come as some surprise that I am actually rather fleet of foot. Seriously. I can run pretty fast.

And so I feel as if it is my duty to protest the recent proclamation of America’s Tim Montgomery as the fastest man on Earth. Sure, he just set a new world record of 9.78 seconds for the 100-meter dash, but what does that really prove anyway? Continue reading »